so called interview

it has to be situated at the vicinity of dataran merdeka.
it has to fall on 28th aug, 3 days bfor our national day.

that's wat i'm in for... hari kemerdekaan REHEARSAL = roadS CLOSURE = JAM!!!

the route cudn't work as planned, trapped in a massive jam, daughter may b late for a job interview, search desperately for alternative route, this.. was wat my dad felt when he saw the 4 orange cones blocking the damn road which he totally din foresee.. super BEK CHEK!!!

yeh was late for 20 mins, but luckily it's nth.

moz batchmates who had gone tru the interviews gave the same remark.. juz go in n chat only la.. wa seh like damn relaxed.

ahhh hrs past... damn... i juz hate to wait.
the more i wait, the more nervous n restless i got!

hence i've accumulated heaps of nerves truout the 4 hrs or more. my chill attitude don apply to such occasions?! wat.. my confidence n self-esteem r diminishing?

then su ann came out.. MY TURN!! gosh... my nerves got up to my throat the moment i open the door n greet the interviewers. man the environment inside was soo tense. i dunno it's bcos of me or the 2 non-smiling interviewers.

'chuen' lady interviewer: apa no. ic?
me: lapan lima........

'chuen' lady interviewer: KUAT SIKIT!! *in a stern voice*
me: hah... *stunned for awhile*

wei i din c that coming lo, everybody bfor this said CHAT only! tot they shud b nice n frenly. NO... she's not!!! eh don scare ppl lidat can anot... my 1st job interview leh, have sum mercy pls!

then... i forgot it's bfor or during my introduction... i was suddenly told to STAND UP. as if there's not enuf to scare the shit out of me, i was told to TURN AROUND.

oiii apa ni? this is not auditioning for malaysian dreamgirls ok! i don need to turnaround for u to c my uninteresting figure n stats.

OMG that means there muz b sth so SALAH wif me!!

i had no choice but to stand up. i was like.. turnaround?.. shait.. did i stain my pants? n at that moment did i realise sth.

c, my shirt was tucked into my pants nicely. but bcos the cutting is bit short, so when i sit, the tucked in-part of my shirt was pulled out unintentionally.
she act noticed that!! my gawd!! wat sharp eyes she got.

so when i was told to stand, the tuck-in part of my shirt naughtily slipped out of my pants, as if i din tuck in my shirt at all. this is BAD impression, i don wan to b commented as tak sopan or tak senonoh or watever. i simply tucked in sum bits of my shirt wif my fingers. *while showing an embarassed smile*

well she din say a word.. but i pretty much think this is my mistake la. takkan she fancy my butt rite? n hor bfor tat she mentioned that peiling's baju kurung is the proper attire for interview.

anyway my panic attack was in full mode dah. i muster all the energy i got to SUPPRESS it, act cool je la. seriously the panic attack had burnt out many neurones in my brain. i can't explain my final yr research project fluently even in english!! was desperately stringing the key words blindly into sentences. drug disscovery. virtual screening. anti-inflammatory drugs. MAPK pathway. MEK1 inhibitor. woosh wat a hard time i had!

nx Q was wat do i think abt recreational drugs.. glad that it's not a difficult question. managed to answer it wif my pathetic vocab ability. i warm myself up. this leads to the nx question... how do v stop ppl from taking those recreational drugs? unexpectedly i gave them the kinda answer that soothes their ear, yee juz when i tot it's juz typical essay style answers. having said that, they hoped that i'm willing to serve in rural areas where ppl r deprived of basic healthcare education. *how stupid of me to lead them to this part of the converstion!!* gosh afterwhich i made another heroic statement which pleased them so much they praised me it was the 1st time they heard such answer!

wait... i answered entirely w/o my mind filtering wat i was saying. man i myself think that for that moment i reli mean it.. i sound so sincere! like whoa... i can b so noble actually! i reli don mind to go to those ulu places? but i tot all the while i wan to b in kl n nowhere else?! man am i producing these answers juz bcos i was under pressure n my brain was not able to function properly n i'm juz a hypocrit who wans to impress.. i used to loathe hypocrite n wth... i may b juz 1 of them! my my... which is me? honest or hypocrit? suddenly i got this identity crisis.

end of interview. surprisingly my session was shorter. anyway juz rite after i stepped out of the room, RELIEF! i can no longer hold on the panick attack that i've suppressed, while my inner self was battling, cos i dunno which is me, plus hormones raging...

huuuuuuuu i'm going to sabah! my tears juz spilled out, in front of my batchmates!! don ask me y.. it's juz complicated. haha i think i frightened peiling cos she yelled for edmond while comforting me. wa damn sia sueh lo! y do i have to do such embarrasing thing?

it's nth to cry for.. it's juz a so-called interview... it's juz a formality... v were pretty sure to work for government watever it may be... y do i succumb to such emotions... dang!!! i have very low EQ lo. control, gal... CONTROL!

haih....
hahaha...
i'm all calm n peaceful now.. when i looked back at wat happened this morning... i reli had a gud laugh... i damn stupid sumtimes la.


=PMSPenny=

lee chong wei

yoohoo!! MALAYSIA's 1st ever olympic SILVER medallist in men's badminton singles!!
like fuyoh, his historical y'know, not an abc feat where any ali ah kau or muthu can achieve.

but it's so sad to c how he's being USED. it's juz cheap n dirty.

pity this guy. he's back to his home soil.. at the wrong time. hope he can b back to his family n get a gudnite's sleep.

update on my life.. back in kl for 17 days..

my lifestyle for these past 2 weeks was like an apple.. left to rot.. at home. when there's only me rotting, i'll go.. man i gotta get out of this place! but when there r 2 fella rotting tgt (me n bro), getting all crappy n lame, when u feel the scorching sun out there, when ur kaki s r working or not in kl, when u look at the toyota that u can't get it moving.. ok better rot at home!

17 days... n look wat i've done!


CHANGE HAIRSTYLE

.. after a yr of crappy hair.. *life as a poor student in glasgow hoho. i've permed my hair but it's frizzy n the curls r all out of place cos i seriously dunno how to maintain lo! y can i nvr wake up to a gud hair day?? y my hair can nvr look like a celebrity other than siu fong fong in her 80's??

FACIAL

i looked like indonesian maid when i touched down klia. to all indonesian maids i'm not being derogatory here, juz to associate myself wif dark complexion n skinny. huh sterotyping! bad me! haha gone too far, juz wanna say that i went for a facial. lin-sama went for a facial! like.. whoa! it did make my face feel better seriously, albeit not looking better.

ANYWAY

i'm juz getting used to it. i've nvr reli look gud n dress gud truout my alevel n imu n strathclyde days. alwiz rush to class w/o even brushing my teeth n scrubbing my face properly, w/o combing my hair, simply put on any shirt n pants which i manage to grab in a sea of jumbled cloths, forget to look into the mirror when i get out. OMG!!! y am i like this?? when can i learn to b more ladylike??

##i'm sry to my classmates n batchmates, if i look so bad n became an eyesore that kill ur mood for a luvly morning, i sincerely apologize here.##


SHOPPING

i've went to jaya jusco, carrefour, times square, pavillion, gardens mid valley, each once.


WATCH MOVIE

i've only watched 1 movie-the Dark Knight. salute Heath Ledger, he's got himself adsorbed into Joker.. "Y SO SERIOUS?" eeks so creepy but u can't help but sympatize him for his traumatic past at the same time. superhero movies nowadays r no more saving damsel in distress, they r deep, n there r certain elements that u can identify wif. this is 1 cool superhero movie hey! but need to watch again to grasp more of it cos it's too long, mind went blank sumtimes.


COUCH POTATO

been tortured by the lack of variety n creativity wif national tv until 8TV came along. n then there's this luxury called astro that i've deprived of all these yrs. my parents act pasang astro AFTER i graduate n kononnya they say it's bcos they wan to watch olympic's live telecast. anyway now that i have all the time in the world, if being a couch potato is sth u'll get paid for, i millionaire dah! watch all the live olympics events n browse tru all the channels until cock-eyed. watch gao gao, damn siao!

i even make sure i don miss any episode of tong sam fong bou tho i've oredi watched it in glasgow. dak dak dei is so cute! chung ka yan is sooo likeable... damn jealous lo so pretty adi summore got long legs summore look gud in formal wear summore can act! wa unfair!


##thanks daddy n mommy, luckily u guys can tahan the temptation to pasang astro for so many yrs, if not i reli can't get ANY of my assignment done.##

PACK MY ROOM

i dunno where to start. there r clothes everywhere, accesories from big to small scattering here n there. n if u r to barge into my room, u'll b punished by stepping on 1 of my earrings that hurt u so bad u'll cry for mommy. c, i don have the rite furnitures to start wif. i need a rack so instead of sweeping everything under the carpet, i can shove it all in the rack n slam the door shut n say bye bye to mess nyeh nyeh nyeh. waiting for any1 willing to fetch me to ikea. *hint hint

***


OMG! such himono-onna-ness... sheez!


ok ENUF! i've lazed too much until my backbone crooked. sagittarian in me... unleashed!!!
i'm gonna live a better tmrw, n of course, get outta the house n straighten my backbone.

i'll blog abt olympics, blog abt how i miss glasgow, sort out photos of previous trips, get my travelogue going n b a better person. haha these r sum reminders for myself.. cos i'm even lazy to on my comp now. i sleep til 12pm almoz everyday n lie on the sofa moz of the time n stil don feel fresh. save me!

of 1 lousy morning, an apology n a stressful event

got up at 8.30am today. huh? n wat's more, i don even need my freaking alarm clock wif the wake-the-whole-kampung-up-except-me ringtone. that's WAY too strange for anybody who knows me well.


ok it's the damn electricity cut. the fan went off out of a sudden n my hypothalamus sensed a rise in temperature n send sum impulse to my brain to wake me up so that i can get out of my sauna-ish pigsty in time. to put simply, i'm a heat-sensitive person.

**

n i guess there's this thing in my genes, my temper wil flare n anxiety wil strike for no reason when it gets HOT n STUFFY! i can't stand even the tiniest weeniest silliest kinda mistake.


then i grumble n nag like a post-menopausal auntie wif sagging boobs wth.

yes, there were victims, few of them. since i'm writing this, i wan to say SORRY guys. n esp U, SORRY. i think this fella is not interested in reading my blog. serves this fella rite, cos i damn ego to say it once more. here's it!

**

anyway life become so meaningless w/o electricity. LOST! i was. walk to the tv set only to realise the tv won work. get my laptop, thinking that i can blog abt it only to realise that the batt was not charged. wanted to call sumbody but it's too early to do so. wanted to read newspapers but the natural light source was not bright enuf. oiii wat can i do??!! damn mou liu. it's not a gud thing when ur life is TOO dependent on sth, but y'know, it's ELECTRICITY. *sigh*


++++++++++++++++++++++


ytrday went to that fella's popo's bday. alamak damn gan jiong bfor attending THE occasion. well to many ppl it's nth much to stress abt, it's not even blogworthy. not that i wan to strike an impression of a prim n proper guai guai lui or wat, juz wan to keep mistakes down to a zero. but hey, i don sound likeable, i don look likeable n i don behave likeably, this quite an uphill task ok!!

jeng jeng jeng... the time came n i was in the restaurant. i forgot did i even call po po. damn a lot of ppl stress kao kao... i juz stretch my lips sideways to the max heeeeee=) b polite ma.. heeeeee=)

n of course shut my mouth so i won risk saying anything wrong. since i have a bad habit of blurting out sum words out of nowhere that wil offend ppl w/o me knowing it.. gone case.

it's quite uneasy at 1st... i look at the ceiling i look left look rite finding a sight that i can rest my eyes on.. i fidget a bit... finding a sitting position that i'm comfortable wif... play wif my fingers a bit...

then i rest my eyes on the uncle to my rite... HUH omg!! UNCLE!! wahpiang i nvr realise uncle (that fella's dad)is sitting RITE BSIDE ME ALL THE TIME. i quickly turned to him n greeted, hi uncle, giggling like mad at the same time. not funny meh?!
oh wait... shait! i was giggling like mad! now that i think of it i can c a cloud popping out from uncle's head..


this is not gud.


anyway thank god the food was served n that's when i can channel all my attn on food which means, less stress. i eat n eat n eat like nobody's business. 8 or 9 course later, v called it a day.

mommy n daddy, u both have groomed me well since i was a baby, juz that i'm not that kinda material sum times. hope i don sat lai u guys in front of other ppl.


=fidgetyFiona=